Wednesday, 23 April 2008

Expiliation is always a hair raising experience... So to speak :P

I went to the trichologist today... And, keeping with the highest traditions of the Indian barber community, was subjected to the most painfully atrocious radio programming... Infact, i put to you, my discerning and almost certainly mentally challenged readers, that the barber's prowess at hair-styling is best judged by his ability to zero in on the worst radio program traversing the airwaves at any given moment...

My barber chose a radio station called "meow"... This admirably ridiculous station marketed itself as a women-centric radio station... And owing to some vague parallels between the fairer sex and felines, styled itself "meow"... This is pardonable (the media world having committed other, more hideous crimes). What is NOT pardonable is the insistence of the RJ to start every conversation with the word "meow"... THIS i found most trying... Still, i could've overlooked this misguided brand marketing if the content was any good. Sadly, my troubles were not to be alleviated... The RJ, having meowed to her heart's content then proceeded to expound on the question of whether or not the old joke that women never reveal their true age has any truth in it... This disturbed me on various levels... Why should anyone care? Why should SHE care? How dumb did she have to be to go about dissecting the ludicrous "problem" on a public broadcast service? I don't know what disturbs me more, the fact that she was allowed to go on air with such garbage or the fact that there were plenty of people calling in to comment?

All through this i comforted myself by thinking of the wonderful haircut i would get as a direct result of the barber feasting his ears on this awful rubbish. Alas! 'twas not to be... The music played was not half-bad and, consequently, the haircut i got was, at best, indifferent...

Wednesday, 16 April 2008

'Angus' reminds me of 'Anus' and 'Fungus'... Not a kind thing to name your child that...

Today's QC reintroduces Angus McPhee... and, just like i did, J. Jacques provided a link to the comic which explains who Mr. McPhee is... I've spent the morning re-reading all the comics from thereon... I blame J. Jacques... Any one who points out my tendency to not take responsibility will also find out about my tendency to get violent and stab people with swords... :P

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

"Bushido" sounds a LOT like "Bullsheeto" :P

My friend, Ankit, who is very nice (his boss agrees), sent me an imitation Katana from Japan (where he is currently pretending to work hard)... He sent me an imitaion (blunt edged) sword because he knows me too well to trust me with a sharp blade...

It's a beautiful sword with and awesome Dragon engraved on the blade as well as on the scabbard... :D

Enemies of the Samurai, BEWARE! The warrior has nothing better to do than take pictures of his pretty sword and is therefore liable to slice your head right off only to lessen the boredom... :P



Thursday, 10 April 2008

HAHAHAHA

Found this gem in the 22nd Rajputana Rifles Mess... Very apt for an Infantry unit... :P

These guys had the most awesome collection of silverware i've ever seen... and i've seen plenty... What distinguished their collection was that theirs was very rich in antiques... They had a silver Surahi which has only one other copy... the copy is in Hyderabad's Salarjung Museum... They also had a silver cocktail shaker with names of about 10-12 cocktails etched along the rim. When you turned the cylindrical body of the shaker so that the notch reached a particular cocktail... The ingredients of the cocktail would appear in little rectangular boxes carved into the body of the shaker!! :D :D :D

I'm so Bored!!

I've been reading so much lately that my grandmom thinks i'm preparing for an exam... Not funny in the least...

Andamans!!!

These are pictures i took using my cell phone in Port Blair (Andamans)... For a more comprehensive pictorial account refer to my Picasa Web album... Ask me for an invite...

Random Photography near the mess...

View from the Mess...


Beach attached to the mess...


Jolly Boy Island... Snorkeling!! :D

Thursday, 7 February 2008

the BUTT of all jokes... :P


The DELIGHTFULLY hideous Mosquito Man at the Kala Ghoda Festival :-)

Monday, 10 December 2007

The question is... Who is dumber?

I recently got the following story as an e-mail forward. I am usually weary of such "oh-how-cute!!" stories and, true to form, i was weary of this one. But, for some inexplicable reason, i read it... You're sure this story's gonna turn out about how i actually liked the forward... No... I hated it. But more than hatred i was overcome with wonder... Read the story and i'll explain...

True Love Means...

A girl and a guy were speeding over 100mph on a deserted road on a motorcycle.

Girl: Slow down, we're going too fast. I'm scared! And I don't want anything to happen.

Guy: Come on, don't worry. I know what I'm doing. Your having fun right?

Girl: NO...please stop. I'm really scared

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I LOVE YOU! Now please slow down.

Guy: Give me a hug.

*Girl hugs him*

Guy: Can you help me out here? Will you take me Helmet off of me and put it on you? It's bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle has crashed into a building break failure. Two people found, but only one survived.

The Truth is: That halfway down the road the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead, he had her say she loved him and felt her hug him for one last time. Then had her wear him helmet so she would live, even though it meant that he would die.


How DUMB was the "biker"?? Any idiot with a learner's license will tell you that it is nearly impossible for a geared vehicle to keep moving if you cut the throttle. All he had to do was take his goddamn hand off the throttle and the contraption would've spluttered to a halt... No matter HOW fast he was going...Also, if he crashed into a building at high speed, no helmet in the world could've saved that poor girl... But that is not the cause of my wonder... The wonder is that this story has been turned into a sort of parable about the greatness of love... I've done some research (yes, i'm currently very bored) and found this story posted on various sites which publish quotes and sayings and stories about love and other mushy stuff... And i've read some of the comments at these websites... "oh its a beautiful tale!", "i sent this to my wife and said i'd do the same for her", " my personal opinion is that guy actually cared for her. it's not everyday a guy cares for a woman like that"... you get the picture... It is number five according to user votes on this site. The person who sent it to me, god bless her soul, said it made her cry... It made me cry too... but for different reasons...

So, the question is... who's Dumber?? The biker or the thousands of people who helped turn this story of ridiculous idiocy into a fable about true love?? Wonko the sane had the right idea... My faith in our intellectual superiority to other beings has been fundamentally shaken... Life continues in its obstinate insistence on being ludicrously devoid of humour...

Sunday, 25 November 2007

Spotting

Below are a few pictures of my friend Rajeev...i've put in one picture of a "primitive" simian... Just for comparison... If you can spot the simian, Rajeev's evolved sufficiently... :-)

Thursday, 22 November 2007

Reflections...Not in a mirror.... On life....

Two things happened recently that have somewhat forced me to change my outlook on life a bit... for the time-being anyway.

First... i visited someplace... an orphanage, if you must know. Needless to say... it was a very moving experience. It's funny how people keep saying "needless to say" and then say it anyway...

However, literary and conversational nuances are not the subject of this post. As i was saying, the experience moved me not a little bit... it moved me a great bit... not physically moved me, you understand, but moved me in the metaphorical sense. It made me think of how frivolously i spend my money, my time, my energy, and anything else that is in my power to spend. People who know me would, at this juncture, wonder what i'm talking about because i'm not known to spend much of anything... let alone money and energy... Even so... when confronted with the fate of those less fortunate than me... ANY spending seems rather frivolous to me... So, that being as it is, i've decided to cut down on my expenses, such as they are, by at least 20%... So far i've succeeded...

The second thing that happened recently happened when i was returning home from the abovementioned orphanage (which had moved me so)... I was in a local train compartment... I was sitting there, reflecting on life's tragedies, minding my own business... when suddenly i heard music... Well, it could be called a good approximation of what we generally refer to as music. It was a guy playing the harmonica (which, as i've pointed out to many, is different from a harmonium)... The Harmonica happens to be one of my favourite instruments... And this man happened to play some of my favourite (old hindi) tunes on it... Needless to say, in a movable state as i already was, i was moved yet again. I gave the chap 10 rupees... i thought it wasn't enough....but, forced by a long standing habit of not giving, i didn't give him anymore. I'm not quite sure, why this particular incident had an impact on me... I'm not even sure WHAT impact it had on me... But i've been thinking about it ever since... none of my thoughts make sense or are in the least bit coherent ofcourse... but the fact remains that i'm thinking about it... and i can feel some madness coming on...

Life... as i've oft stated... is not funny... But i've realised that, however un-funny life may seem, we must never take it seriously... That's just suicide... or atleast a giant key to crazy-town...