A word to the wise

Toast with ham slices and red chilli pickle is not a particularly good idea... Much as one thinks it is, it isn't. Trust me on this one.

Google For the Nobel in Literature!

No, i'm not using 'Google' as a verb in the title of this post. I'm using it to refer to the company. And i'm suggesting that they should get the Nobel Prize for Literature.

Yes, i know that they should get one for science. But that is obvious.

The argument for a Nobel in Literature is a tad more derived.

As you all [by 'all' i mean the both of you (and in 'both', i include myself)] probably already know, Google has a service known as Google Suggest. For the uninitiated, this is the service that gives you those helpful little suggestions saying "Did you mean ... " when it thinks that you have misspelled something. That in itself was pretty darn good. But recently, they have improved that service by shifting it to an earlier time-point in the search process, namely, at the search field itself WHILE you're misspelling... Correcting you in real time and thus, hopefully, reducing the time it takes for you to accurately search for stuff.

Anyhow, the argument for the Nobel goes thus -

• One of the reasons that Nobel committee hands out these prizes is to promote the languages.
• Nobel laureates in literature write good stuff.
• If this stuff is recognised for its brilliance through a Nobel, more people might read it and benefit from it.
• NOBODY (other than people on the decision committee and other Nobel laureates) reads that stuff.
• Learning to spell is a first step towards acquiring good language skills.
• Google Suggest is a practical way of getting people to learn the right spelling.
• MILLIONS of people use Google.
• End of Argument

This argument, admittedly, has its flaws. The first of which is that you can ignore the suggestion. And this certainly i true. But it is harder to ignore a suggestion on your computer screen correcting YOUR spelling when making that correction might make your search easier. It is, however, ridiculously easy to ignore the whole body of literature that has been awarded the Nobel. And it is EASIER to not read all of the other stuff that didn't get a Nobel to be able to appreciate the quality of the work that DID get it. Google suggest starts at a more basic level... At a grass-roots level. And, out of the millions who use Google everyday, if it makes about 1% think about language and how it is important, it deserves a Nobel for services done to the Language (Whichever language that might be).

Pro Tips

Shaving Pro-Tip: Try not to bleed to death.

Skiing Pro(?)-Tip: Try not to get killed.

Research Pro-Tip: Try shooting yourself. In the head. Now.

A rant by any other name would still be moronic...

I notice now that it's been a while since i have stressed the singular lack of comedic ability that is an attribute of life as we know it. So then, for those of you who are not aware... LIFE IS NOT FUNNY... not in the bloody least funny... And why do i say so?? Well, seriously, do you need me to list out reasons?? Look around you... Life is like a series of bad jokes in a play... A play that started out being a light hearted take on something serious... became a serious take on something light hearted... and then just lost itself in mindless drivel... Pathetic attempts at humour... Mostly slapstick... extremely repetitive... not to mention tiresome for the cast... seriously... we need to call the director of the play and tell him that although we appreciate his efforts, he has GOT to stop doing this!


OF COURSE there's a reason for this rant... and OF COURSE you have a shrewd idea of what it might be.... So, before you go all "Awwww... what happened now?? Is it what we think it is??" ... Let me be like one of those Preemptive strikers and say that No! It isn't what you think it is... It is merely a collection of a lot of things which, at 3 in the morning, came out of that twisted mass of cells i call my brain in the form of this blog post... Inconvenience caused is cherished and highly enjoyed.... :D


Anyway.... moving on (leaving my twisted brain behind)... what was it that i was supposed to move on to?? Ah well... nothing here... and, this early in the morning, or this late in the night, whichever you prefer, even the murky depths of my mind refuse to oblige me with the customary offering of bilge with which they are usually so forthcoming... I will therefore end this... Right after i reiterate... LIFE IS NOT FUNNY!!!

Ok... i'll stop now... Cheers :D And take good care of yourself... :D

I wish I couldn't see the irrationality

Logicians have but ill defined
As rational the human kind.
Logic, they say, belongs to man,
But let them prove it if they can.
 -- Oliver Goldsmith

I'm sick of trying to speak logic to people... And I've finally realised that the statement "Man is a rational animal" has no basis in fact...

Irrationality is the norm... Game theorists have it right... They define the moves in a game that would be most beneficial to the players... But they don't assume that the players would necessarily play in the most logical, beneficial way... There is in fact, built in to their equations, a large probability that only a small fraction of the population would make moves that are optimal for the situation... and people who ALWAYS do the right thing are unheard of... By and large our notion, that people are rational, is wrong... They are as irrational as Pi...

More importantly... in the real world, not only are people wont to act irrationally, they are also liable to hate you if you point this out to them... or act in what you consider to be a more rational manner...

So basically, you may be right... and may even have demonstrated, without any room for doubt, that you're right... but people will continue to do what they've always done and ignore the new method... WHY?? Because... "I've ALWAYS done it this way!" ... And you can do nothing about that... Except continue to be the idiot who wants to do things differently... or the idiot who'd not mind trying things out... even if they may potentially lead to disaster...

Where, pray tell, is your sense of adventure?? Let go! Have fun!! Go out and DO stuff!!! Even if its crazy... MORE SO if its crazy!! If nothing else, you'll have an awesome story to tell your grandkids!!

No It ISN'T!!

Ever been pissed off by Rhetorical questions??? :P

Ever noticed how on people's web profiles they have pics with labels like "that's me... Cute na??" or "that's my Boyfriend/girlfriend.... Isn't he/she hot??" or "isn't my car jus ROCKING???"

Well, no... most of the time the stuff you like is not necessarily stuff I like... so stop asking me with the ASSUMPTION that I will agree with your point of view... More likely than not, when you inquire about the beauty of your significant other, I am going to reply "Well, you know what they say! Beauty is in the eyes of the Beer Holder!" or some such equally insulting thing ("Not enough alcohol in the world!" is one of my favourites... closely followed by "Primates are genetically close to us but not close enough for it to be socially acceptable for you to date one")... Seriously, don't ask me...

So, once and for all, your car is just like any of the other million or so that came out of that production line, your girl/guy looks OK, you were cute JUST before you asked if you were cute or not, and the term 'Rocking' has been abused to death, please stop using it.

Cheers,
Adi

P.S: I'm guilty of using rhetorical questions in a singularly annoying manner myself but you must not presume to compare yourselves with me :D