Life's a joke..... It's not funny

Nash's Equilibrium and How it Feeds My Pathological Narcissism

2011-02-15T09:30:00.006+05:30

Assumption #1: The popular version of Nash's equilibrium and its applicability to barroom pick-ups is well known amongst today's bar-going population.

Assumption #2: These dynamics are gender independent or at least perceived as such by said population.

Logical Conclusion: I'm the most beautiful bastard at the bar!

ख़ाक

2010-10-24T03:53:00.003+05:30

Haven't written in a while... Wrote this today in response to Bani's query about my research... It must be noted that it was her that started the conversation that led to the first stanza and she further inspired me to write the rest of the poem. She is my muse and this would not have been possible without her :-)

ख़ाक

(आदित्य)

बातें ही तो बनाना आता है,

वीद्यार्थी हूँ मैं,

बस और मुझे ख़ाक आता है

यहाँ आके फँस गया हूँ,

न पढने में मज़ा आता है,

और बिन पढ़े न चैन आता है

मेरी मिन्नतों पे हँसता होगा खुदा,

कहता होगा बेवक़ूफ़,

दुआओं से भी कभी रिजल्ट आता है?

ठीक फरमाया मैं कहता हूँ,

पर हुज़ूर,

बिना मिन्नतों के भी ख़ाक रिजल्ट आता है !

हँसते हैं लोग मुझपे,

और मेरी हालत पे,

मुझे खुद रोना आता है.

कमसकम आपकी हंसी के काम आ गया,

वरना विद्यार्थी हूँ,

विद्यार्थी क्या ख़ाक काम आता है!

A word to the wise

2010-09-26T22:18:00.003+05:30

Toast with ham slices and red chilli pickle is not a particularly good idea... Much as one thinks it is, it isn't. Trust me on this one.

Google For the Nobel in Literature!

2010-06-08T02:37:00.005+05:30

No, i'm not using 'Google' as a verb in the title of this post. I'm using it to refer to the company. And i'm suggesting that they should get the Nobel Prize for Literature.

Yes, i know that they should get one for science. But that is obvious.

The argument for a Nobel in Literature is a tad more derived.

As you all [by 'all' i mean the both of you (and in 'both', i include myself)] probably already know, Google has a service known as Google Suggest. For the uninitiated, this is the service that gives you those helpful little suggestions saying "Did you mean ... " when it thinks that you have misspelled something. That in itself was pretty darn good. But recently, they have improved that service by shifting it to an earlier time-point in the search process, namely, at the search field itself WHILE you're misspelling... Correcting you in real time and thus, hopefully, reducing the time it takes for you to accurately search for stuff.

Anyhow, the argument for the Nobel goes thus -

One of the reasons that Nobel committee hands out these prizes is to promote the languages.
Nobel laureates in literature write good stuff.
If this stuff is recognised for its brilliance through a Nobel, more people might read it and benefit from it.
NOBODY (other than people on the decision committee and other Nobel laureates) reads that stuff.
Learning to spell is a first step towards acquiring good language skills.
Google Suggest is a practical way of getting people to learn the right spelling.
MILLIONS of people use Google.
End of Argument

This argument, admittedly, has its flaws. The first of which is that you can ignore the suggestion. And this certainly i true. But it is harder to ignore a suggestion on your computer screen correcting YOUR spelling when making that correction might make your search easier. It is, however, ridiculously easy to ignore the whole body of literature that has been awarded the Nobel. And it is EASIER to not read all of the other stuff that didn't get a Nobel to be able to appreciate the quality of the work that DID get it. Google suggest starts at a more basic level... At a grass-roots level. And, out of the millions who use Google everyday, if it makes about 1% think about language and how it is important, it deserves a Nobel for services done to the Language (Whichever language that might be).

Pro Tips

2010-02-18T07:08:00.003+05:30

Shaving Pro-Tip: Try not to bleed to death.

Skiing Pro(?)-Tip: Try not to get killed.

Research Pro-Tip: Try shooting yourself. In the head. Now.

What have YOU been Wondering about?

2010-01-14T06:34:00.005+05:30

I've been wondering about some things lately... There's nothing new about that... I usually wonder about a lot of things... Constant alcohol consumption has rendered me unable to comprehend many things that even undergrads can understand... Anyhow... I decided to compile a list of some of the things i've been wondering about lately to see if i can't understand them better by knowing that i don't understand them now...

1) When the hell is the bus home?? I mean, seriously... there are like a thousand different time-tables and all of them have different schedules for the bus... The public transport system in Syracuse has defeated me...

2) What variables should i REALLY worry about?

3) Chaos. It was a really bad idea on the part of the scientific community to think up the idea of chaos... I mean... Come the fuck on! How am i supposed to do anything without thinking that i'm not taking NEARLY enough variables into account??

4) Why is the staff at Dunkin' Donuts so rude??

5) When will the next Nusrat arrive on the music scene?? I wish he/she would hurry up and sing already...

6) Where can i get a Devnagari transliteration of Allama Iqbal's work?? Transilteration. Not translation.

7) Why am i not drawing comics anymore??

8) Should i get Ubuntu? Or should i upgrade the Fedora that i have?? Or should i forget about using an awesome, open source OS and stick with my copy of XP (which sucks)?

9) What's up with Altaaf Raja? Haven't heard from him lately...

10) Is giant sperm in Drosophila a form of ornamentation?? If so, how is it perceived by the female fly? Is the phenotype coupled with chemical cues of some sort? Or is it more of a physical/functional type of selection??

11) When will people grow up and not make fun of what i do?? When will i grow up and not laugh hysterically when i see a paper about 'rooster ejaculates'?

12) What are quantum dots??

13) Why the hell can't Graphene be used as a holographic material?? I mean, is it physically impossible?? Or can it, and that chemistry graduate student didn't know what he was talking about??

14) Will I ever stop procrastinating? Do you want to go get a beer and talk about this?

15) How many of these do you think i'll know the answer to in the foreseeable future?

Wanderlust

2009-03-07T23:35:00.010+05:30

This comic by A Softer World just about sums up the last three days of my life... :D

The alt-text on the comic reads "i feel exhausted and perfect" ... So do i :D

My bike was without a rear brake for almost four months... So when the spare parts required were finally procured... i went off to celebrate with a buddy and beer... Beer led to dinner... and once filled to the brim with food and alcohol we decided we should go on a bike trip. So, at 12 in the night, we set out for a place called Skandagiri (Which is a hill)... We didn't know how to get there... we only knew that it was roughly 50 km down NH-7 in a town called Chikballapur...

We reached Chikballapur at around 2 am... And then spent the next two and half hours criss-crossing the damn town trying to find Skandagiri... Not many were about at this hour and the one's that were, gave extremely vague directions... The general population seems to have no sense of distance...

Anyhow, we finally ran in to a chap who worked as a trail guide at skandagiri... And he took a ride with us and showed us the place... THAT'S when we realised that we had come woefully unprepared for the trek up the mountain... The biggest problem was that we didn't have torches... And the guide refused to lend/sell us his... So we had to hire his services, SOLELY for the torch...

We reached the top by about 4.30 - 5 ... And then, after admiring the clear, starlit night sky for a space, fell asleep... ALMOST missed the sunrise... Luckily, there were some people around who were all excited that the sun was about to rise and were very loudly proclaiming their excitement... This woke us up... Just in time to see the sun emerge from behind the fog.

Sunrise

View from the top (i wish i had a better camera)

On returning... we played basketball in the evening... THEN we went for coffee to the all night CCD... stayed till about 3 am... Went home... but decided that if we slept now we won't get up in time for Horse Riding.... So decided not to sleep... Spent the night watching Sholay instead :D

Went horse riding at 6 in the morning... :D

I feel exhausted and perfect... That about sums it up... :D :D :D

Tryst with a Little Egret

2009-03-04T14:18:00.006+05:30

Today I came upon a little egret while on my usual post-lunch walk around the JNCASR periphery.

Image Courtesy Wikipedia

Now if i say that i had never before seen this kind of bird i'd be lying... There are hundreds of them in JNC... Moreover, i'd be decieveing my public (to borrow a phrase from Wodehouse) if i said that i hadn't met this particular representative of the species before too. I had, on several occasions, observed this very bird in the exact same spot where i happened to meet it today.

However, our relations had never before been more intimate than those of two passing strangers. Not even a cordial head-nod or a smile. Today, however, i decided to change this status and consequently, upon observing said bird in its usual spot, stopped to say "hi".

Now, i don't know if any of you have ever said "hi" to a bird before, but i must warn you that this is quite the wrong procedure to follow when trying to establish cordial contact between self and bird. It startles them... makes them go all jittery... Not very 'nerves-of-steel' types, these birds...

Anyway, quick as i am, i realised the mistake i had made in accosting the bird in this manner and hastened to make amends... That is to say, i hastened to stand very still and make no sound whatsoever. This gesture seemed to be taken kindly by the b., and, after about 15 minutes of self doing the statue act while being observed by it, it took a nervous step in my direction.

Thus, having identified me as a friendly and altogether alright chap, the bird relaxed... and so did i... It was still sensitive to any sudden movements on my behalf, but it let me approach closer nonetheless... Very white of it, i thought, to have trusted me knowing the ghastly treatment others from my species are known to have meted out to his kind. As time went on (and a considerable amount of it went on) it got used to my presence and even accepted me as part of the surroundings... So comfortable did i make it feel that it even turned its back to me... a thing no bird with any sense of self-preservation would do in the presence of a potential predator unless it is with a view to wing it in the opposite direction or when it has realised that the potential predator is in fact not one at all.

Anyhow, the bird now felt that Aditya was quite a decent fellow and could be trusted not to produce a rifle and proceed to fire at will. And thus it decided to resume its business, its business being to quench its thirst with water flowing through the stream and to find a few fish to go with the beverage. Remarkable fishing skills these birds have. They can give whoever it is that holds the current human record for fishing a run for his or her money anytime of the day. It proceeded to demonstrate to me the correct technique required to procure fish from the stream. This consisted of standing very still, waiting for a fish to come within range, and then striking with lightning speed with one's beak and trapping the poor water dweller in it. Having demonstrated the correct procedure, he went on to show-off... He no doubt thought "Sod the correct procedure! THIS is how the pros do it!" and then basically just waded through the water picking up fish as it went along... To say i was spellbound is to put it lightly... :D

When we parted, it was because i had work to finish and also did not want to impose my company on it while it lunched (I was unsure of what a bird's views are on the matter of company at meal times). But one thing is for sure... Guaranteed, even.... And that is that i shall return to meet my winged friend as often as possible. I prefer its company to many of my own kind... :D

A rant by any other name would still be moronic...

2009-02-23T03:16:00.005+05:30

I notice now that it's been a while since i have stressed the singular lack of comedic ability that is an attribute of life as we know it. So then, for those of you who are not aware... LIFE IS NOT FUNNY... not in the bloody least funny... And why do i say so?? Well, seriously, do you need me to list out reasons?? Look around you... Life is like a series of bad jokes in a play... A play that started out being a light hearted take on something serious... became a serious take on something light hearted... and then just lost itself in mindless drivel... Pathetic attempts at humour... Mostly slapstick... extremely repetitive... not to mention tiresome for the cast... seriously... we need to call the director of the play and tell him that although we appreciate his efforts, he has GOT to stop doing this!

OF COURSE there's a reason for this rant... and OF COURSE you have a shrewd idea of what it might be.... So, before you go all "Awwww... what happened now?? Is it what we think it is??" ... Let me be like one of those Preemptive strikers and say that No! It isn't what you think it is... It is merely a collection of a lot of things which, at 3 in the morning, came out of that twisted mass of cells i call my brain in the form of this blog post... Inconvenience caused is cherished and highly enjoyed.... :D

Anyway.... moving on (leaving my twisted brain behind)... what was it that i was supposed to move on to?? Ah well... nothing here... and, this early in the morning, or this late in the night, whichever you prefer, even the murky depths of my mind refuse to oblige me with the customary offering of bilge with which they are usually so forthcoming... I will therefore end this... Right after i reiterate... LIFE IS NOT FUNNY!!!

Ok... i'll stop now... Cheers :D And take good care of yourself... :D

What can i say?? :D

2009-02-21T22:51:00.002+05:30

Steps to Humour:
1) Observe the picture shown below.
2) Read entry number 14.
3) Laugh like crazy.
4) Then read entry 15.
5) Smile.
6) Contemplate #s 14 and 15 together.
7) Laugh till it hurts.
8) Don't send me a mail calling me a filthy pervert.

I wish I couldn't see the irrationality

2009-01-19T13:04:00.003+05:30

Logicians have but ill defined
As rational the human kind.
Logic, they say, belongs to man,
But let them prove it if they can.
 -- Oliver Goldsmith

I'm sick of trying to speak logic to people... And I've finally realised that the statement "Man is a rational animal" has no basis in fact...

Irrationality is the norm... Game theorists have it right... They define the moves in a game that would be most beneficial to the players... But they don't assume that the players would necessarily play in the most logical, beneficial way... There is in fact, built in to their equations, a large probability that only a small fraction of the population would make moves that are optimal for the situation... and people who ALWAYS do the right thing are unheard of... By and large our notion, that people are rational, is wrong... They are as irrational as Pi...

More importantly... in the real world, not only are people wont to act irrationally, they are also liable to hate you if you point this out to them... or act in what you consider to be a more rational manner...

So basically, you may be right... and may even have demonstrated, without any room for doubt, that you're right... but people will continue to do what they've always done and ignore the new method... WHY?? Because... "I've ALWAYS done it this way!" ... And you can do nothing about that... Except continue to be the idiot who wants to do things differently... or the idiot who'd not mind trying things out... even if they may potentially lead to disaster...

Where, pray tell, is your sense of adventure?? Let go! Have fun!! Go out and DO stuff!!! Even if its crazy... MORE SO if its crazy!! If nothing else, you'll have an awesome story to tell your grandkids!!

No It ISN'T!!

2009-01-07T20:06:00.001+05:30

Ever been pissed off by Rhetorical questions??? :P

Ever noticed how on people's web profiles they have pics with labels like "that's me... Cute na??" or "that's my Boyfriend/girlfriend.... Isn't he/she hot??" or "isn't my car jus ROCKING???"

Well, no... most of the time the stuff you like is not necessarily stuff I like... so stop asking me with the ASSUMPTION that I will agree with your point of view... More likely than not, when you inquire about the beauty of your significant other, I am going to reply "Well, you know what they say! Beauty is in the eyes of the Beer Holder!" or some such equally insulting thing ("Not enough alcohol in the world!" is one of my favourites... closely followed by "Primates are genetically close to us but not close enough for it to be socially acceptable for you to date one")... Seriously, don't ask me...

So, once and for all, your car is just like any of the other million or so that came out of that production line, your girl/guy looks OK, you were cute JUST before you asked if you were cute or not, and the term 'Rocking' has been abused to death, please stop using it.

Cheers,
Adi

P.S: I'm guilty of using rhetorical questions in a singularly annoying manner myself but you must not presume to compare yourselves with me :D

Ummm... What other purpose???

2008-12-01T19:40:00.003+05:30

HAHAHAHA .. .Found this gem outside my institute... Cracked me up, this one did! :D

I can only say "WTF??" and gesticulate wildly ...

2008-10-04T18:13:00.006+05:30

I put that pic in for a reason... I think that the city of Bangalore was designed in exactly the same way as Windows ME... By degenerate drunkards....

There are like HAZAAR streets here called "18th cross"... WHAT THE F***??
Every part of Bangalore looks almost exactly the same as any other part... You can't bloody tell which place you're in by just looking around... You have to read signs... And here's the kicker... The signs, or most of them, are in Kannada... Again... WHAT THE BLOODY F***???

AND they have 25 buses numbered 25a to 25y !! ALSO, these don't have a common start/end point... No Sir! it isn't that easy here... These have a common VIA point... You KNOW i'm going to say it... WTF?!!?!

&%@#$@^&%#(@#

What bothers me more is that this could've been such a WONDERFUL city (Their Vidhan Sabha makes Bombay's Mantralaya look like a puny little outhouse)!!

Instead it has turned out like one of those kids turn out.... The ones who show great promise early in life only to turn into useless drunkards later in life... working for the government... designing awful cities... :P

Life is not funny...

Namma Uru Bengalluru

2008-09-08T19:15:00.002+05:30

I'm in Bangalore... At this place... Loving the place... Oh and Bangalore ain't bad either...

But i do take issue with the fact that everything, and i mean EVERYTHING, in B'lore shuts by 11pm... Those of you who don't think that that's an absolutely absurd time to shut shop, please leave... I don't need your kind here...

I mean... these guys are nuts... If one wants to have a late dinner at a nice place... one can't... unless one wants to blow up the entire month's salary at the Taj or something... Besides, all city buses stop functioning at 11... And the Riksha-waalahs are actually thinly disguised robbers... They keep asking for extra charges on the meter... i never got that... and they ask for double the meter charge post NINE pm!!! Another absurd time chosen by the Bangaloreans... i don't get this one either, especially since i think the meters are rigged anyway...

I won't comment on the traffic because that is always bad anywhere outside Bombay...

Bangalore has it's merits too... The weather's pretty nice... and M.G. Road is AWESOME!! But that's about it, methinks... I am not counting the merits of staying on my campus here because that's not the real Bangalore...

Humour is humorous only if it is based in truth

2008-05-21T19:21:00.005+05:30

I just saw two whole seasons of "Here's How I Met Your Mother" in one, awesomely big, marathon viewing session.
It was... leGEN - Wait for it - DARY!! :D ... True Story...

Life Is Not Funny

2008-05-17T18:55:00.002+05:30

No reason for this post. I just felt that i hadn't asserted the non-funniness of life enough lately. So... here is me saying LIFE IS NOT FUNNY... There, i said it... Makes me feel exactly the same way as i did before i said it... Life is not funny, and it tries so damn hard to be funny it's driving me bloody crazy...

Expiliation is always a hair raising experience... So to speak :P

2008-04-23T21:43:00.004+05:30

I went to the trichologist today... And, keeping with the highest traditions of the Indian barber community, was subjected to the most painfully atrocious radio programming... Infact, i put to you, my discerning and almost certainly mentally challenged readers, that the barber's prowess at hair-styling is best judged by his ability to zero in on the worst radio program traversing the airwaves at any given moment...

My barber chose a radio station called "meow"... This admirably ridiculous station marketed itself as a women-centric radio station... And owing to some vague parallels between the fairer sex and felines, styled itself "meow"... This is pardonable (the media world having committed other, more hideous crimes). What is NOT pardonable is the insistence of the RJ to start every conversation with the word "meow"... THIS i found most trying... Still, i could've overlooked this misguided brand marketing if the content was any good. Sadly, my troubles were not to be alleviated... The RJ, having meowed to her heart's content then proceeded to expound on the question of whether or not the old joke that women never reveal their true age has any truth in it... This disturbed me on various levels... Why should anyone care? Why should SHE care? How dumb did she have to be to go about dissecting the ludicrous "problem" on a public broadcast service? I don't know what disturbs me more, the fact that she was allowed to go on air with such garbage or the fact that there were plenty of people calling in to comment?

All through this i comforted myself by thinking of the wonderful haircut i would get as a direct result of the barber feasting his ears on this awful rubbish. Alas! 'twas not to be... The music played was not half-bad and, consequently, the haircut i got was, at best, indifferent...

'Angus' reminds me of 'Anus' and 'Fungus'... Not a kind thing to name your child that...

2008-04-16T09:37:00.005+05:30

Today's QC reintroduces Angus McPhee... and, just like i did, J. Jacques provided a link to the comic which explains who Mr. McPhee is... I've spent the morning re-reading all the comics from thereon... I blame J. Jacques... Any one who points out my tendency to not take responsibility will also find out about my tendency to get violent and stab people with swords... :P

"Bushido" sounds a LOT like "Bullsheeto" :P

2008-04-15T10:46:00.003+05:30

My friend, Ankit, who is very nice (his boss agrees), sent me an imitation Katana from Japan (where he is currently pretending to work hard)... He sent me an imitaion (blunt edged) sword because he knows me too well to trust me with a sharp blade...

It's a beautiful sword with and awesome Dragon engraved on the blade as well as on the scabbard... :D

Enemies of the Samurai, BEWARE! The warrior has nothing better to do than take pictures of his pretty sword and is therefore liable to slice your head right off only to lessen the boredom... :P

HAHAHAHA

2008-04-10T13:11:00.003+05:30

Found this gem in the 22nd Rajputana Rifles Mess... Very apt for an Infantry unit... :P

These guys had the most awesome collection of silverware i've ever seen... and i've seen plenty... What distinguished their collection was that theirs was very rich in antiques... They had a silver Surahi which has only one other copy... the copy is in Hyderabad's Salarjung Museum... They also had a silver cocktail shaker with names of about 10-12 cocktails etched along the rim. When you turned the cylindrical body of the shaker so that the notch reached a particular cocktail... The ingredients of the cocktail would appear in little rectangular boxes carved into the body of the shaker!! :D :D :D

I'm so Bored!!

2008-04-10T13:09:00.003+05:30

I've been reading so much lately that my grandmom thinks i'm preparing for an exam... Not funny in the least...

Andamans!!!

2008-04-10T12:53:00.002+05:30

These are pictures i took using my cell phone in Port Blair (Andamans)... For a more comprehensive pictorial account refer to my Picasa Web album... Ask me for an invite...

Random Photography near the mess...

View from the Mess...

Beach attached to the mess...

Jolly Boy Island... Snorkeling!! :D

the BUTT of all jokes... :P

2008-02-07T00:20:00.000+05:30

The DELIGHTFULLY hideous Mosquito Man at the Kala Ghoda Festival :-)

The question is... Who is dumber?

2007-12-10T12:43:00.000+05:30

I recently got the following story as an e-mail forward. I am usually weary of such "oh-how-cute!!" stories and, true to form, i was weary of this one. But, for some inexplicable reason, i read it... You're sure this story's gonna turn out about how i actually liked the forward... No... I hated it. But more than hatred i was overcome with wonder... Read the story and i'll explain...

True Love Means...

A girl and a guy were speeding over 100mph on a deserted road on a motorcycle.

Girl: Slow down, we're going too fast. I'm scared! And I don't want anything to happen.

Guy: Come on, don't worry. I know what I'm doing. Your having fun right?

Girl: NO...please stop. I'm really scared

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I LOVE YOU! Now please slow down.

Guy: Give me a hug.

*Girl hugs him*

Guy: Can you help me out here? Will you take me Helmet off of me and put it on you? It's bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle has crashed into a building break failure. Two people found, but only one survived.

The Truth is: That halfway down the road the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead, he had her say she loved him and felt her hug him for one last time. Then had her wear him helmet so she would live, even though it meant that he would die.

How DUMB was the "biker"?? Any idiot with a learner's license will tell you that it is nearly impossible for a geared vehicle to keep moving if you cut the throttle. All he had to do was take his goddamn hand off the throttle and the contraption would've spluttered to a halt... No matter HOW fast he was going...Also, if he crashed into a building at high speed, no helmet in the world could've saved that poor girl... But that is not the cause of my wonder... The wonder is that this story has been turned into a sort of parable about the greatness of love... I've done some research (yes, i'm currently very bored) and found this story posted on various sites which publish quotes and sayings and stories about love and other mushy stuff... And i've read some of the comments at these websites... "oh its a beautiful tale!", "i sent this to my wife and said i'd do the same for her", " my personal opinion is that guy actually cared for her. it's not everyday a guy cares for a woman like that"... you get the picture... It is number five according to user votes on this site. The person who sent it to me, god bless her soul, said it made her cry... It made me cry too... but for different reasons...

So, the question is... who's Dumber?? The biker or the thousands of people who helped turn this story of ridiculous idiocy into a fable about true love?? Wonko the sane had the right idea... My faith in our intellectual superiority to other beings has been fundamentally shaken... Life continues in its obstinate insistence on being ludicrously devoid of humour...

Spotting

2007-11-25T19:03:00.000+05:30

Below are a few pictures of my friend Rajeev...i've put in one picture of a "primitive" simian... Just for comparison... If you can spot the simian, Rajeev's evolved sufficiently... :-)

Reflections...Not in a mirror.... On life....

2007-11-22T13:06:00.000+05:30

Two things happened recently that have somewhat forced me to change my outlook on life a bit... for the time-being anyway.

First... i visited someplace... an orphanage, if you must know. Needless to say... it was a very moving experience. It's funny how people keep saying "needless to say" and then say it anyway...

However, literary and conversational nuances are not the subject of this post. As i was saying, the experience moved me not a little bit... it moved me a great bit... not physically moved me, you understand, but moved me in the metaphorical sense. It made me think of how frivolously i spend my money, my time, my energy, and anything else that is in my power to spend. People who know me would, at this juncture, wonder what i'm talking about because i'm not known to spend much of anything... let alone money and energy... Even so... when confronted with the fate of those less fortunate than me... ANY spending seems rather frivolous to me... So, that being as it is, i've decided to cut down on my expenses, such as they are, by at least 20%... So far i've succeeded...

The second thing that happened recently happened when i was returning home from the abovementioned orphanage (which had moved me so)... I was in a local train compartment... I was sitting there, reflecting on life's tragedies, minding my own business... when suddenly i heard music... Well, it could be called a good approximation of what we generally refer to as music. It was a guy playing the harmonica (which, as i've pointed out to many, is different from a harmonium)... The Harmonica happens to be one of my favourite instruments... And this man happened to play some of my favourite (old hindi) tunes on it... Needless to say, in a movable state as i already was, i was moved yet again. I gave the chap 10 rupees... i thought it wasn't enough....but, forced by a long standing habit of not giving, i didn't give him anymore. I'm not quite sure, why this particular incident had an impact on me... I'm not even sure WHAT impact it had on me... But i've been thinking about it ever since... none of my thoughts make sense or are in the least bit coherent ofcourse... but the fact remains that i'm thinking about it... and i can feel some madness coming on...

Life... as i've oft stated... is not funny... But i've realised that, however un-funny life may seem, we must never take it seriously... That's just suicide... or atleast a giant key to crazy-town...

I'm Bored....

2007-06-17T22:15:00.000+05:30

Friend to me: Dude, you look bored...
Me to Friend: You have NO idea...

2007-05-18T16:43:00.000+05:30

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

- Voltaire

So there you have it... Voltaire agrees with me... But there's another voltaire quote which goes "A witty saying proves nothing"... But, then again, a witty saying DOES add spice to conversation :D

Anyway, like i keep stating... Life is much like a stand-up comedian's act except that in this case, it isn't funny. It's not funny that i can talk quite to my satisfaction when i'm talking to someone i DON'T have a romantic interest in... But the minute life puts in front of me a girl i like... and that's it... i babble on and on and on and on and on and... you get the picture.... It is also not funny that i can think of no more examples of what is not funny... except maybe the red+yellow+white t-shirt that i recently purchased... it's quite chic and NOT funny(OR weird OR stupid) in the least!!

Moving on... i find that i have nothing to move on to... and that isn't funny either...

Some more exam time doodling

2007-04-28T21:00:00.000+05:30

As is apparent... I'm not too finicky about where i doodle...

Exam time Creativity

2007-04-28T20:51:00.000+05:30

It was that part of the year again. The part when exams arrive and force me to open my books. But i'll be damned if i can be forced to study :P
This is just a small sampling of all the doodling (and allied tp) that i did throughout the duration of my exams...

This is what i drew (or rather, doodled)

Black and White

Sepia

Negative

HEHEHEHEHE

2007-04-28T20:46:00.000+05:30

I was in Wilson College to give my M.Sc. final year exam... As would be expected of me, i wasn't prepared...I could only described as a bundle of nerves... And STILL... i found it in me to be amused by the writing on the old regulator...

Errr.... Can i have the time please??

2007-04-28T20:44:00.000+05:30

Came across this panel full of LED time pieces.... Found it funny at the time...

2007-04-28T20:40:00.000+05:30

This particular peak is known as "Babita's Boob"... For a very special reason... Anyone who's been a cadet at the Naval Engineering College, Lonavala would know the reason... The rest may ask me... I'm not a cadet, present or former, of the said institute but i have friends who are...

2007-04-28T20:33:00.000+05:30

The Sunset as seen from Tiger's leap (or was it lion point??), Lonavala...

An incomplete essay on an ill-defined subject

2007-03-09T19:28:00.000+05:30

I sometimes wonder about who we are…. Yes i know that many people wonder about that and that many people have written about their wonder…. But that doesn’t stop me from wondering and i write about it because….. well, because….. Because I CAN!!

Anyway, moving on… who ARE we??? Are we what we believe we are? or are we what OTHERs believe we are??? OR do we start believing and thus BECOME what others think we are?? This line of philosophical questioning ofcourse has been done to death and the debate is endless…. And so, having found no enlightenment with the philosophers i looked towards the scientists (who are only barely removed from philosophers in their ability to confound and confuse)…. well anyway, turns out there is quite a lot of concrete science that’s been done and is being done with a view to answer questions about the brain, behaviour, and the big question “what does it mean to be conscious??”

Now… it’s not my place to try and explain to you about the work of these scientists… I just wanted to share with you the (fairly useless) bit of information that there exists a body of work in this field which is slightly better than the certifiably insane reasonings of philosophers…. Slightly better in the sense that its not certified insane…. though many believe it to be quite mad….

For those of you who are interested in the science of cognition and behaviour…. A good place to start might be Dr. V.S. Ramachandran’s book “Phantoms In The Brain”…

For an insight into genetics and behaviour… Try and get any book that might give you info on Seymour Benzer’s work…. There’s a book called “Time, love & memory” which is quite good…

Could Do with some logic...

2007-03-05T12:35:00.000+05:30

The other day i was watching this movie called "evolution"... Its about how an alien lifeform hitch-hikes its way onto Earth... Well the movie was supposed to be fictional so i put up with the stupid idea that the aliens evolve at a rate about a million times greater than any earthly lifeform..... However, the protagonist (a "scientist") is looking at the DNA of the aliens and is shocked... then rushes to his sidekick and says "They have TEN Base-pairs".... This is a perfectly STUPID statement to make because it implies that the DNA of the alien is only ten units long.... Then he says that "Every life-form on Earth has FOUR base-pairs".... That's when it hit me... He meant that we earthlings have four KINDS of BASES... not Base-PAIRS (which is a different thing)....And the aliens have 10 kinds of bases... and that is the supposed reason for their difference from us (this idea is pretty daft too but is pardonable).... The one about base pairs is NOT.... Why can't they check their bloody facts before they make a movie??? Any high-school biology student could have taught you the difference between saying 'bases' and 'base pairs'....

XKCD

2007-03-05T12:00:00.000+05:30

These are a selection of XKCD webcomics that i like... Actually i like all of them... These are a selection of XKCD webcomics that i think you might like... Personally, i prefer the ones with a lot of science in them...

This is THE life!! :D

2007-03-05T11:35:00.000+05:30

A clear sunny afternoon + A light breeze + The sound of waves crashing + A good Book + A HAMMOCK = Pure BLISS :D

2007-03-05T11:31:00.000+05:30

The Original Pic

The Final Product

Mamta's budday gift....

2007-03-05T11:19:00.000+05:30

Came across this book at the United Services Club Library... Was reminded of the Happy fact that some people have more time than i do :D

2007-03-05T11:12:00.000+05:30

Definite proof that i have way too much free time... I had a syringe with me... Filled it with water and did that to my hand drop by drop.... Like i said... TOO MUCH TIME

2007-03-05T11:09:00.000+05:30

This is a paper clip twisted out of all recognition placed on a piece of black paper... Of course, you may say this is the result of me having too much time on my hands and nothing better to do... i choose to call it ART :P

2007-03-05T11:04:00.000+05:30

That's me and my buddy Thapliyal on my terrace... This pic was taken on the 1st of Jan 2007... The only sunrise we'll see the whole year... too damn lazy to wake up in time for the rising :P

It's Thapli's data cable that i'm using now to upload pics....

FAILED ATTEMPT :-(

2007-03-05T10:57:00.000+05:30

Ah... I was planning on growing a full-blown military style moustache... The mission had to be aborted coz i had to go meet a professor... I needed a reccomendation letter from him so couldn't afford to scare him :P

It still pains me to see this photo...

2007-02-21T13:21:00.001+05:30

2007-02-21T12:02:00.000+05:30

My father had a bike,
he called it Katie.

I have a bike,
I christened it Katie ki beti.

:D

My bike crossed its first 1000 kms :D

2007-02-21T11:53:00.000+05:30

That's me on my building's terrace. Over the years me and my friends have fallen in love with my terrace. We spend a lot of time up there. Its our "Happy place", so to speak.

The day this particular photo was taken, i was alone up there. Was feeling exceptionally euphoric. Composed a poem. Reflected on life. Appreciated nature. My thoughts turned philosophical and i started wondering about our place in the ubniverse. Then i got a call.... and my mom said "Get your ass home right NOW!!!"..... And that was that :P

P.S: Somehow i look good only in silhouettes..... i know why but pretend to not know.... :P

2007-02-15T13:07:00.000+05:30

ACTUALLY..... Life is SOOOOOOO funny it HURTS :-)

My dear mother very Un-telligently sent my cell-phone data cable off to my dad (who's in port blair) thinking it was the Digicam data cable.... As is quite obvious, this has made me mad.... Not mad in the sense of people who stay in mental asylums (because that i was already) but mad in the sense of being VERY ANGRY...

Anyway.... The consequence ofcourse is that i can't upload photos from my cell for some time to come.... and therefore shall use this time to load pics that i had taken long back.....

2007-02-14T17:12:00.000+05:30

No it's NOT what you think....This is a sign i saw at a shop selling denim jeans or, as the salesman liked to call them, "Jheen Pants".

2007-02-12T15:28:00.000+05:30

BRILLIANT!!!

A student once asked his teacher,

"Master, what is enlightenment?"

The master replied,

"When hungry, eat. When tired, sleep."

And THAT my friends is the mystery of life explained. We spend too much time thinking about trivial issues and doing things we don't want to... Maybe it's time for us to change... Maybe it's time for us to be happy... I think i'll go shoot someone ;D

Zen Story

2007-02-12T15:18:00.001+05:30

Came across this zen story recently... Found it quite moving... especially since it brings out what i've always thought is true... There is nothing to be gained from reasoning with people when their mind is obscured with emotion (anger, hate, doubt, etc)... It is better to silently accept their actions and let THEM reach a conclusion about their behaviour on their own... They all realise their mistakes... tis only a matter of time... Of course... sometimes it may be too late... but then no one said life was fair...

Is That So?

A beautiful girl in the village was pregnant. Her angry parents demanded to know who was the father. At first resistant to confess, the anxious and embarrassed girl finally pointed to Hakuin, the Zen master whom everyone previously revered for living such a pure life. When the outraged parents confronted Hakuin with their daughter's accusation, he simply replied "Is that so?"

When the child was born, the parents brought it to the Hakuin, who now was viewed as a pariah by the whole village. They demanded that he take care of the child since it was his responsibility. "Is that so?" Hakuin said calmly as he accepted the child.

For many months he took very good care of the child until the daughter could no longer withstand the lie she had told. She confessed that the real father was a young man in the village whom she had tried to protect. The parents immediately went to Hakuin to see if he would return the baby. With profuse apologies they explained what had happened. "Is that so?" Hakuin said as he handed them the child.

2007-02-12T14:16:00.000+05:30

It's Raining in FEB!!!

Absurd as nature is known to be.....i'm not surprised.

Besides it was a nice change of weather... The scent of rain is one of the best in the world... Ofcourse, its no match for hot chocolate :D

The weather pulled me out of the house and on to my bike for a ride till the United Services (US) Club.... What i wouldn't have given for the company of a beautiful woman :P
But as we all know.... The joke's on me.... and life is not funny.... SO i was obliged to spend time there alone.... May be a good poem will result.... Let's see.....

2007-02-12T13:58:00.000+05:30

Goodbye My Friend...
You have served me well.

I Wish to announce the retirement of my dear old wallet. He has served me quite well these last two years but i fear the work has taken a toll on him. No longer able to function well, tis best that he retire from his duties and give way to younger blood. He has agreed to stay on in my cupboard in an advisory capacity.

Welcome... New Wallet

I'm also pleased to announce the arrival of my new wallet which has joined duty forthwith.

Tis a new age wallet and i trust that it'll bring some much needed newness to the workplace.

Ofcourse, his somewhat prohibitive price means that, once he was payed for, he didn't have much work by way of carrying any money :P

2007-02-11T17:09:00.000+05:30

KUTREYA!!!

"Outside of a dog a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read"

- Groucho Marx

That's a pic of rajeev (one of my best friends) and a dog that he volunteers to walk around his place so he can attract girls..... Not too sure which one's the dog out here :P

2007-02-09T21:53:00.000+05:30

"Life's not funny.....coz the joke's on me!!"

That's an original quote by yours truly. To an outside observer observing my existence right now, the scene would appear to be quite amusing. I'm knee deep in work (read shit).... I'm supposed to be studying..... But i'm writing on my blog instead.... and the writing is insipid and uninspiring..... I hate bad writing, and i'm doing it right now.....

I called the MTNL complaint cell yesterday and they put me on hold.... The song they played while i was on hold was "I just called to say i love you"!!! NO you freaking idiots!!! I called to say I HATE YOUR GUTS!!!

This is boring.... I can't write any more..... and i'm sure you're thinking "what does he mean 'anymore'???? he can't write at all!!!".... and you're right.... but this is my blog and i can be as lousy a writer here as i wish to be :D

2007-02-09T19:10:00.000+05:30

"Chaos" By James Gleick

Zees ees eh booook aye recently pheeneesed reading.... Its brilliant!!!

Like Douglas Adams says on the cover.... "Reading Chaos gave me the sensation that someone had just found the light switch".

The book, as the more informed amongst you might have guessed, is about the Chaos Theory.

I'm not going to explain what the Chaos theory is..... Read the book!!

2007-02-09T18:38:00.000+05:30

THE KALA GHODA FESTIVAL VINTAGE CAR RALLY
Pretty neat cars.... and lots of Pretty ladies :D

2007-02-08T10:55:00.000+05:30

My Experiments....... with Hair!

I was pretty darn scary wasn't i? Ofcourse, by that i don't mean to imply that i'm not scary anymore.....but a shave and a haircut does go a long way in making me appear recognisably human :D

2007-02-08T10:45:00.000+05:30

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know.: Mark Twain

This is my first post on this blog.... I believe the custom is to write soemthing nice.... something to inspire.... something funny.... something rememberable..... something extraordinary..... i'm sorry.... i am unable, at this point, to oblige.